The Crush - Part 2

Vivek did not need an alarm to wake him up on Monday. In fact he hadn’t slept a wink. He twisted and turned on the bed; heaving a massive sigh of relief as the alarm rang at 5 in the morning. 

He rushed to his class. As he entered the classroom his eyes darted towards Priya’s seat. There she sat, looking angelic as always. She was staring out of the window; perhaps unaware of his arrival. She seemed lost, like when he had seen her for the first time. He went up to her.

“Hi.” He said.

Priya looked at him. For the first time Vivek saw for him, a hint of repulsion in her eyes. Then suddenly she smiled. She got up from her seat and walked away from him, towards Manish – the new kid who had recently joined school. Priya’s attitude changed as she interacted with Manish. She smiled widely and chatted animatedly as neither of them noticed or acknowledged his presence. With each passing second, Vivek’s heart sank deeper into an abyss of disappointment and dejection. Somehow he knew that things were never going to be the same again. Priya never spoke to him again.

Days turned into weeks and weeks into months. The feeling of rejection was bearable. It was her cold avoidance which made deeper hurts on his ego. His grades took a severe beating as he failed in 3 subjects in the first internal exams; the first time he had failed. To everyone around he was a failure, a loser. To his parents he had fallen into bad company. He felt miserable. Only he knew the pain that would choke him every time. Only he knew the feeling of being ignored by the person he loved the most. Only he knew the agony of not being able to sleep inspite of being perpetually exhausted. But he had to get over it. He had a future at stake. He would win back his parents’ trust. With renewed zest Vivek entered 2001 with a determination of doing well for himself.

On that Friday morning the alarm clock did not beep as usual. Vivek had slept peacefully after a long time. He felt thirsty but couldn’t gather himself to wake up. He could stay thirsty for some time more. But the daily routine in his house had begun as usual. He could hear his parents’ voices. He could hear MS Subbulakshmi’s morning prayers emanating from dad’s room. He could hear mom working furiously in the kitchen and talking loudly to the maid. It was annoying. All he wanted was to sleep. It took him a while to realize that his mom was  screaming at him. The noise from the kitchen had been that of vessels crashing on the floor. His bed shook violently. ‘Violent’ was perhaps an understatement as his mother tried desperately to wake him up. Instinct made him bolt out of the room as his mother grabbed his arm and rushed out of the house. Everything around him happened at a ferocious speed. Walls collapsed and people screamed as he tried to get out of the house. And then without warning, just like it had started, the tremors stopped. 

It took him a while to realize the gravity of the situation. Chaos and panic surrounded him. Cries and shouts reverberated in his ears. He looked around. Mom and dad were safe. “Priya” he suddenly exclaimed. What if she was in the school?

The next moment he was on his bicycle and speeding towards school. He didn’t know why but he was certain that his school wouldn’t be able to withstand the quake and that Priya was trapped beneath the rubble. He reached the gates of the school. He let out a mighty sigh as the school stood safe. Yet he needed to be sure. 

"Another quake is on the way" he had heard someone yell on the way. He rushed towards his classroom. It was on the ^4th floor but he covered the distance in record time. He met Dikshit on the way who scowled at him.

“Late as usual. No need to enter my classes henceforth” she muttered.

“What? Don’t you know? Mam, there has been an earthquake? It isn’t safe. We need to get out of here.” He screamed in panic.

“You need to get out of here. Are you trying to be over-smart? Tell me then, who discovered the nucleus?” Dikshit said without batting an eyelid.

“What? What is wrong with you? Why would I joke about this? I am telling the truth. Get out of my way.” And he ran inside the classroom.

As had been his practice his eyes darted towards where Priya sat. There she sat as usual, staring out of the window. She was safe. He could hug her there and then. He walked towards her; his breathing heavy.

“Priya?” he called her in vain as she continued to stare out of the window.

“Please talk to me Priya. I am sorry for what I did. But I can’t lose you. Please look at me once. Please.”

His pleading had effect as slowly Priya turned her head towards him. And for the first time in months she had a smile on her face. He turned around to see if Manish was the recipient. It wasn't. A huge sigh of relief escaped him.

“Thank God you are alright. I was…so worried.” said Vivek as tears welled up in his eyes. Priya kept smiling.

“Don’t worry Vivi. I am perfectly fine. And I loved your gift. Will tell you all about it on the phone. Chalo, I got to go. Bye.” 

Vivek stood there rooted to his spot as Priya walked away. He couldn’t believe his ears. Priya had finally spoken to him. She had forgiven him. And once again, Vivek broke down into tears. He sat down on the bench as he cried like a child. Only this time he was relieved, and happy. His body shook a couple of times as tears flowed freely. His angst, his feelings and his emotions finally had a vent.

***

“There, he twitched again. Something is wrong with my son.” cried Vivek’s mother.

“Mrs. Iyer please have faith in me. Your son is responding well to the treatment. The twitching is just some sort of reflex action. He will be fine” said the doctor.

Mr.Iyer hugged his wife tightly as she cried looking at Vivek’s comatose body. It had been 2 months since the quake. While they had escaped with couple of fractures and bruises, their house was reduced to rubbles. Vivek was caught under a wall that had collapsed as he rushed out during the quake. 13 hours he remained underneath the rubble before rescue arrived. He survived. The doctors however were unsure as to when he would gain consciousness.

***

Vivek lay unconscious, unaware of his predicament. He was happy though. She had forgiven him. Now he could sleep peacefully. For as long as he wanted.

THE END

The Crush - Part 1

 “I told mom that I will only marry you” said Priya as her grainy figure floated across the room.

Vivek’s jaw fell open as goosebumps surged through his body. It had to be a dream. He didn’t care as to why she floated across the room; her feet inches above the ground. It didn’t bother him that her proclamation was ignored by his parents who went about their chores; almost as if they hadn’t heard her. Neither did it surprise him that Priya was present in his house. All he felt was euphoria. He had waited for this a long time. He had almost given up when fate smiled on him. But he had to be sure, very sure.

“Wait. What did you say?” he shouted as he chased her. She didn’t seem to listen as she continued her brilliant display of levitation. She vanished out of sight as an irritating sound pierced his ears. He felt a violent tug from behind and the very next moment he lay in his bed. It took a moment for him to register what had happened. Instinctively his hand reached out for the alarm clock to stop the beeping which got more irritating with the passing second. He sighed deeply as the world around him slowly came into focus. It had been a dream after all. He had already forgotten the premise. The only thing he remembered was that she had agreed to marry him. And that he felt incredibly happy. Alas, a mere dream! ‘An early morning dream usually comes true’, his heart consoled him. He felt slightly better.

He kept thinking of Priya as he went about his morning routine. She was the only thought on his mind as he cycled his way to school. He yawned widely as he parked the bicycle.

“The school needs to change its timings. 7 o’ clock is cruelty” he told Sapan, his classmate and best friend. Sapan too nodded rubbing and pushing his eye into its socket.

“And I hate Mondays. The first day of the week and the class begins with Neeta Dikshit’s period.”

Vivek stopped in his tracks.

“Shit. I completely forgot. I haven’t done her homework. She is going to eat me alive.”

Sapan stared at him with horror writ on his face. He knew the gravity of the situation and also the inevitable conclusion. Dikshit was a terror. She had a hawk like face with cruel eyes which enhanced her menace. Barely a month ago she had blasted the daylights out of Vivek as he failed to answer the question ‘Who had discovered the nucleus of a cell?’ And she tore him apart. She officially enlisted him in her list of blacklisted students. And for the next couple of weeks he became an object of everyone’s fascination. Everyone recognized him as ‘the boy who got it’. Some stared at him with annoyance for being dumb. Some stared at him with pity. For those who had been on Dikhsit’s receiving end he was a war hero.   

And true to their fears everything went as they had anticipated. 10 minutes into the period and the classroom reverberated with Dikshit’s screams.

“Get out. Get out of my class. Shameless creatures. You think science is a joke? Guess your parents have a lot of money. You stand on the road and you will realize your true worth. And that’s nothing. Why do you all even bothering coming to the class?” she rambled on without a pause as Vivek and three other guys made their way out of the classroom towards the Biology lab where they would have to complete the homework.

As Vivek walked past the other students he felt countless eyes boring into him. He didn’t care what others thought. He hated biology and hated Dikshit even more. But he cared about what Priya thought. He glanced behind as he exited the classroom. Priya sat there staring out of the window. Thankfully she wasn’t staring at the ‘losers’ of the class. But then again, she had stopped caring for him a long ago. Why did she always have to act so distant? His feeble attempts at a conversation earlier had met with stoic silence.

It had not always been so bad with her. She was a good friend once. He remembered the first day he had seen her. The classroom had been abuzz with murmurs of a new girl who had taken admission in the 9^th standard. He saw Priya sitting on one of the benches. Vivek gaped at her in astonishment. She had to be the most beautiful girl he had ever seen. Her innocent angelic face gave a wry smile every time a girl or a boy (mostly boys) approached her for introduction. Although she didn’t show it Vivek knew that she was scared of the new environment. Vivek watched her from a distance. And he fell in love with her.

As days passed he became increasingly enamored by her. But he feared approaching her. Why would she talk to him? He was an average student with no talent whatsoever. He was good at chess though. But given the immense popularity of chess players in India, making an impression on her was difficult. He also remembered the first time she had spoken to him. She had waved at him out of the blue one day. Well actually she had waved at a girl standing behind him. He just happened to be in the way. She smiled at him as he realized his folly. The next morning she greeted him with a ‘Hi’. That was the happiest day of his life. He couldn’t wipe off the grin from his face the whole day. And soon they had become friends. She was one of the three people he had invited to the canteen on his birthday. The handmade greeting card she gave him soon found space in his small trunk of treasures. It contained all those things which he deemed too special to discard. His favorite was a perfectly spherical piece of rock he had picked up from Kovalam beach in Kerala. With arrival of the card, the rock became his second favorite.

He was careful of not making his feelings obvious, to her nor to others in the class. He even resisted talking to her often in the class. He didn’t want any rumours about ‘them’ to ruin her reputation in the class. They spoke on the phone. Although he had been strictly forbidden to call her (“My mom doesn’t like it you see” she had said), she would call him whenever possible. He was crazy about her. But he couldn’t tell her how he felt. Not just yet. The 10^th board exams hovered close. He couldn’t do anything to screw them up; neither for him nor for her. He had to wait.

He was the first person she had called when the board exam results were announced. She had scored 85%. And it didn’t matter that in her happiness and excitement she had forgotten to ask for his result.

11^th Science was getting to his nerves. It was tougher than he had expected. He had only elected the stream because she had. But then she also wanted to become a doctor. He didn’t really have a clue as to what he wanted to do. But the tough course ensured that they couldn’t talk often on the phone. She would call once or twice a week and would hang up after a quick ‘Hi’. Gradually the phone calls ceased altogether. He had to make a move or risk losing her forever. And he found a way out.

It was the first Saturday of August. Boys and girls everywhere were tying friendship bands to each other. Vivek had made up his mind. He was going to tell her how he felt. His heart beat viciously as he struggled to get on with the class. Although it was a half day it felt like an eternity to him. He was the first person to dash out of the class as the final bell rang. He waited at the parking for her. And then he saw her. He waved at her. She approached him with a big smile.

“There you are. I thought you would have left. Happy Friendship Day.”

“Happy Friendship Day. I brought something for you.” he said.

Priya frowned slightly. Vivek took out a small package from his bag and gave it to her. Priya looked around to check if anyone was watching. She quickly put it in her bag.

“Aren’t you going to see it?” asked a bewildered Vivek.

“I will. Later at home. Thanks a ton Vivi (she had made that nickname for him). Chalo, I got to rush.”

Saying so she rushed towards the gate. Vivek’s heart missed a beat as he saw Priya get into a car. The glasses were tinted and he couldn’t make out who else was in the car. Vivek stood there for some time trying to comprehend the utter disaster his attempt at proposing to her had been.

He returned home feeling stupid. She hadn’t even bothered to open the gift. But she had said she would open it at home. Perhaps she was going through the gift at present. Perhaps she would give him a call any moment. He waited anxiously as his ears strained to hear the phone ringing. An hour became two; then six. No sign. It rained quite heavily that evening throwing Vivek in a more morose mood. He had no option but to wait till Monday.

                                           (to be continued....)

The Good Old Days!

Its just Tuesday and I am already exhausted. Two more days before my beloved Friday ushers in a wonderful Saturday. The ride back home from office is incredibly bone rattling thanks to the extended rains and the inferior quality of the roads which messed them up completely. And the dust is choking me. So while my spine bears the brunt of the pothole riddled road, my nose is already watery with all the dust and the vehicle fumes. 

I reach home, throw my office bag away, get licked by Bruno (my pet lab), knock my shoes off and sit on the chair with feet on the table. My wife and mother greet me with a smile that makes my mood slightly better. My wife is peeling off the potatoes while mom goes off to make me tea. The TV is on. The channel is Asianet -a Malayalam channel. A commercial is showing Mammootty (a Malayalee actor) promoting branded dhotis (called Mund in Malayalam). I pick up the remote to change the channel when my mother calls out from the kitchen;

“Don’t change the channel. I am watching ‘Amma’.”

The first thought on my mind is ‘how the hell did she know that I was going to change the channel?’. Then a groan escapes my mouth. I had the misfortune of watching a couple of scenes of the above mentioned serial. Its about an 8-9 year old girl and the trials and tribulations she goes through. That’s her. 

Her character in the serial could give Mother Teresa a run for her money. Another girl not more than 12 plays the nemesis to the 8-9 year old Mother Teresa. And that's her.

All the characters in the show are either crying their eyes out or scheming the downfall of the 8-9 year old Mother Teresa. Its a sob fest. The show has been running since forever. Its probably airing its 1200^th episode now. And my mother, after giving me the tea, proceeds to watch the show as the two girls on it ham their way to eternal glory. They are irritating to the core. Probably worse than Aditya Narayan’s singing when he was young (Remember, yaaro mere pass to aao, meri mushkil door bhagao….?).

Most of the Malayalam serials are sob fests and equally pathetic. One serial ad goes ‘this woman has misfortune as a sibling…”. And the screen shows 20 odd characters sobbing for God knows what reason. Going by the amount of tears these characters shed, Kerala has to be the unhappiest state in the country. But its not just Kerala.

TV sucks nowadays. So many goddamn channels and so many goddamn crappy shows. I am not even going to mention the daily soaps. Quality has been sacrificed for higher TRPs. Someone asked me if I followed ‘Big Boss’ which was celebrating the 7^th year of its success. “I have a life” was my only plausible reply.

The most disgusting evolution/degradation has been that of the NEWS channels. The premise of 'masalafication' of NEWS channels is inexcusable. So I turn on this popular news channel one day. For a very good part of the morning I have to witness a scary guy in black clothes giving various tips to please ‘Shani’. That's him.

An hour later, another channel airs a program called ‘Saas Bahu aur Saazish’. Another one airs a similar program called ‘Saas Bahu aur Betiya’. And what irritates the crap out of me is the dramatic representation of alleged crimes, incidents and accidents.

The biggest let down has been MTV. A channel which represented the freedom and rebellious spirit of youth is reduced to showing songs like ‘Anarkali disco chali’. And not to mention the numerous serials and reality shows being aired on it. It’s a MUSIC channel for God’s sake.

I remember the first time cable made its way into my house. It was October 1992. Zee TV had just been launched. And unlike the 24 hour channels today, back then the programs began from 7 in the evening. So we waited anxiously as we stared at the big ‘Z’ on the screen. There were a handful of channels back then.

One of them was ATN – a music channel. It used to play the same old Nadeem Shravan kind of songs day in and day out. But the monotony was broken by the movie it played in the afternoon. 9 times out of 10 they were off mithun. But it was fun nevertheless.And not to mention the countless clippings of an invisible Prabhudeva dancing to 'mukkalla mukkabla...laila...'

And then there was Star TV. Back then some of the best series were aired on it. It was my first brush with the western culture. So programs like Remington Steele (which featured Pierce Brosnan who was without doubt the best looking guy in the world), The Wonder Years, Doogie Howser MD, MASH, The Crystal Maze, Batman, Manimal, Dracula and not to mention Baywatch kept me hooked to the idiot box.

Be it the title track ‘some people stand in the darkness…’, the bikini babes, surfing, David Hasselhoff running on the beach, the hot Yasmeen Bleeth or the amazing Pamela Anderson as CJ Parker, Baywatch played a great role in my growing up years. The show made ‘lifeguards’ sexy. The fact that the show was banned in my house added to the allure.

I even tried my hand at dailies like Santa Barbara and The Bold And the Beautiful. Then there was Riviera which was my earliest encounter with erotica on TV.

MTV was another channel that was banned for us. The elders and the moral police saw MTV as an attempt by the western world to poison minds of the youth in the country. And that was all the more reason for us to watch the channel. MTV introduced me to the world of rock, pop, reggae, rap and heavy metal genres of music. MTV introduced me to Madonna, Michael Jackson, Brian Adams, Aerosmith, Bon Jovie, Shaggy, Snow, MC Hammer, Diana King, George Michael, U2, Khaled and many more.

Closer home one of the first programs I remember was 'Tara' featuring Navneet Nishaan. And Amita Nangia. I had a huge crush on her. And she was probably the reason I watched the show that went on and on. That's her.

Then there was Campus, Banegi Apni Baat (which had Irfan Khan in it), Saap Seedi, Kab Kyon Kahan, Aahat, Just Mohabbat, Zamana Badal Gaya Hai, Bournvita Quiz Contest, Tol Mol Ke Bol, Ek Minute, Commander, Wheel of Fortune, Wah Kya Scene Hai, Filmi Chakkar, Philips Top Ten, Antakshri and so many more.

I still believe that Aahat was a very good horror show back then. There was also another show called Sannata which aired only a few episodes before being pulled off the air. It was good too. And then there was Zee Horror Show. The haunting title music and the sight of Archana Puran Singh’s laughing demonic head lying on a plate scared the shit out of me. I never watched the show again. She no longer remained the stunner from the movie Jalwa. That's her by the way.

Then there were contests. So many of them. The makers asked some question at the end of the show and we were supposed to send the answer on a postcard. Perhaps the mid 90s was the golden era for the postal department before mobile technology touched Indian shores. I too would send the postcards religiously, hoping for a reply or winning a contest, or just to see my name being flashed on the TV. The closest I came to achieving my moment of fame was when kab Kyu Kahan -a quiz contest hosted by Tara Deshpande (another one of my many television crushes) was on air. That's her.

Every week I would send postcards requesting to participate on the show. And one day I received a reply. I got a postcard asking me to visit the UTV studio in Mumbai for an audition. I was over the moon. In my head I was already on TV. So one fine morning dad took me and my brother to the UTV studio in Mumbai. It was an atmosphere like I had never seen. There was so much activity going on. Nobody noticed us as we walked around. Infact there was a live recording of the show in progress as we waited. My heartbeats rose as I craned my next to catch a glimpse of Tara Deshpande. But in vain.We were greeted by a pretty lady who took us to her cabin. She was very nice to me and offered candies.

"Ok Sunil" she said. “I am going to ask both of you some GK questions. I need to see if both of you are fit to appear on the show.”

And then she proceeded to ask us around 20 odd questions; most of them which my brother and I answered with ease. I remember answering Colombia when asked for the capital of Sri Lanka. And Menaka Gandhi to the question ‘which member of the Nehru family is associated with animal welfare?’.

And then the audition was over. She smiled brightly again and promised to inform me if we had made it to the show. We hadn’t. But her promise gave me hope. I waited and waited. And I never got a reply. When exactly I lost hope, I do not remember. But that one visit was perhaps the best day of my life. That postcard asking me to visit Mumbai stayed with me as a memento for a long time. Again when it got destroyed I do not recollect. It was perhaps one of those moments when you come across a memorabilia, stare at it for a moment, take a deep breath and destroy it. 

As years went by I realized that hoping to be on TV was a long shot. So when my folks urged me to send that sms to appear on KBC I took refuge in statistics which gave me a negligible chance of appearing on TV. 

Alas, times and television have changed. SMS has replaced the postcard. There are hardly any good shows on TV. And one can't blame the makers of the shows. They thrive because their shows have takers. Deprive them of their audience and we might just have the good old television days back. But I am being too optimistic. Its a long shot.

However, on the brighter side, there so many good websites which give me access to the wonderful shows of the old. God bless these website developers for maintaining some sanity in the world. I think I am going to start with The Wonder Years. Or MASH perhaps. Talk about being spoiled for choices.